Through His Eyes
by Songstress of the sea
Summary: A journey to find himself leads Ronald Weasley to Severus Snape. A Fic that follows the two through Hogwarts and after to find love in a new light. Slight angst balanced with some fluff. THIS IS SLASH! Don't like don't read. PLEASE R R!
1. Cauldrons of Tears

Hogwarts - first year- Ronald Weasley

Ron stifled a rush of excitement as he headed towards the dungeons with Harry. He had been looking forward to the potions class the most of all of the classes during this past summer. He had what his mother called a "natural affinity" for the subject. He was her chosen cooking partner and when Ginny or the twins got into scrapes and didn't want their parents knowing he was the one to make the healing salve. His creations always worked the best and even Fred and George acknowledged it. One of the best feelings in the world was them allowing him to help prank because they needed some concoction or another.

Ron stepped into a dank class room and looked around at the numerous potions recipes, books and ingredients dispersed throughout the cabinets and walls. Sitting with Harry he waited eagerly an hoped fervently that what the twins ha lied to him about potions being a nightmare. This was the one thing he knew he could do. He only hoped that the professor, what had they called him...Snape, that Professor Snape treated him well.

-Back in the dormitory after class-

Ron felt despair well up inside of him. The _one_ thing he thought was his calling and the professor had to ruin it. There was no easy way out of it. Either he succeed in potions, gaining him favor with the teacher and losing all hope of friends, or he pretend to be miserable at the one thing in school that he loved, gaining him friends but making him loathe himself. Ron saw only one option working out. He would choose the path of friends. He certainly didn't want to end up like that Granger girl. How would he survive Hogwarts? Still he thought to himself 'If only it weren't for Professor Snape.'

Hogwarts - Third Year - Ronald Weasley

As the years had progressed Ron had almost mastered the art of failing potions. He would slip up now and then cutting ingredients too well, or not containing the temptation to stir correctly. He thought that maybe it was alright to start showing his skills but after seeing his Gryffindor friends arguing with the Slytherins he knew that any attention gotten from the beak-nosed professor would be disdained.

Hogwarts - Fifth year - Severus Snape

'Ugh. Another class teaching those addle pated Gryffindors, I have enough on my hands with that wretched Dolores Umbridge.' Severus Snape knew he was not the pleasantest of people. However, that Potter, he seemed to _always_ want a fight. Nothing could ever redeem Snape in Potter's eyes. There had been several instances now when Severus had saved Harry's life and still the boy seemed convinced of nothing but suspicion. Although...Thinking of Potter did bring to mind the Weasley boy. Over the years Severus had had a grand time figuring out what was going on in Ronald's head. He had started out all of the first years the way he normally did. By terrifying them. However, in the young redhead it had done the opposite of what had been intended. Severus had wanted to scare them into doing _well_, not hiding sheer talent. And yes, he had noticed that while the end result was always a failure, the redhead seemed to know exactly how to mess up every potion in the best way possible. Even when the potions exploded, as they sometimes did, Weasley somehow _knew_ when to dodge. The potions master chuckled, of the course the idiot was in terror of him, Snape had ensured that all students were in order to keep his cover for Dumbledore, yet that didn't mean he had to hide his calling! Severus had thought throughout Ronald's first two years that he was simply lucky and stupid. However, starting during the boy's third year he had almost seen the inner battle the boy was having. The potions professor knew that the temptation of a recipe completed well was a hard goal to fight against. Especially when potions are a natural talent and deliberately ruining them chips at your heart and happiness. Severus sighed and went to grade papers. Someday everything would come out and he would have a long conversation with the boy. Maybe they would even get along. Severus chuckled silently to himself and shook the thoughts of redheads from his mind as he sat down with the essays and a quill.

Shrieking Shack- Seventh Year- Severus Snape

Severus had had it all planned out, he would give Ron the pensieve memories of him and then leave. He had no need to make the man love him. He simply wanted the acknowledgment before he died or disappeared. Here he was now lying on the floor sure his death was imminent and no one would think to search for him and then check him thoroughly for the vial with Ron's name. As he lay there, the pain searing through him and the hard, unforgiving floor pressed against his body he thought of the redhead he held dear in his heart. The memories dulled the pain and remembering the look of laughter on Ron's face during his class made him smile faintly as the world faded to black.

Six months later- Ron

Ron slammed his fists on the table and growled in frustration as yet another potion went up in smoke. Nothing worked for him anymore. He had found Severus in the Shrieking Shack and held the cold body to his chest, a small vial with his name on it had clinked as it hit the floor. He'd picked up the vial and Severus, and run to the healers stationed on the grounds. They had fought grueling hours and had tethered life to his body. Yet fate was fickle, and no matter what they did Severus would not wake up.  
>Ron had seen the memories and they wrenched his heart. His time in Hogwarts was a time of lies and living in constant pain. He knew that he wasn't what one considered <em>normal<em>. In fact he had known he was gay for a while before entering the school. He had just always thought that he would be happiest hiding it, hiding himself. It had been the fool logic of someone too young to know better. Severus' memories caused all of Ron's heartache to flood back in. He saw as the man had figured his charade out better than any of his friends or family. The one person who had noticed him was the one person that Ron had secretly yearned for. The smart potions master with his snide cynicism and blatant honesty.

Ron wracked his brain for any more potions that he had not yet tried. He had visited Severus every day and had done more than anyone to revive him, but still it was to no avail. Ron sighed and grabbed his coat as he disapparated to St. Mungo's.

Ron made his way towards the fourth floor where Severus was being held. The healers didn't know exactly what Voldemort had done to Sev so they had put him with all of the Spell Damage patients, the ones who were never going to recover. Ron still felt angry that they hadn't attempted to treat Severus for snake venom. In fact, the only reason Severus was alive at all was because Ron had made a potion for him to combat snake venom. The healers refused to allow him to administer potions to the unconscious man; Ron had vowed that if he were able, he would find a cure and administer it no matter the consequences.

Entering Severus's room Ron sat down in the chair nestled next to the bed and settled in as the chair molded itself to his body. He had sat and slept long hours in that chair just waiting and hoping for Severus to come back. Ron gazed down on Sev's face. Months spent away from the dungeon had given his face a healthier look and Ron had discovered that the black hair framing Severus's face was not oily at all; it was soft and thick. Ron had worked and waited and _wished_ for Severus to wake up for months now. It had been one failed potion after another. He choked back a sob but broke down a second later.

As Ron lay sobbing into Severus's chest he thought of all of potions and tears and spells that had been for this one man. All of a sudden it hit him. He had looked through countless books and things on snake venom during his second year and what was the one thing he knew worked on venom? Phoenix tears. Fawkes had remained at Hogwarts after Dumbledore's death and was currently being cared for by Minerva McGonagall.

At the Ministry Library

The Ministry Library was the largest collection of magical tomes known to wizard kind. It was referred to as the modern Alexandria. Ron spent days there pouring over book after book. Phoenix tears were a tricky substance to work with. They were healthy enough on outer wounds but they were fatal to ingest. Ron's challenge was finding a way to have the tears retain their healing properties while making them safe to drink. _This_ was his test, all those years of secretly studying and fighting the temptation to make potions correctly, they had led to this life-defining task.

After Ron's extensive research he headed to his potions lab. The twins had built an underground laboratory and because Ron often helped create merchandise for the Weasley's Wizard Wheezes, they let him use it whenever he wanted for whatever purpose he needed. At the potions lab he started his burners. Putting different amounts of the tears in different cauldrons, Ron tried to work fast. He knew that he had to try as many possible combinations as he could without wasting the precious tears. Phoenixes could only cry so much you know. Throwing ingredient after ingredient in the cauldrons and scribbling notes as he went, Ron started his endeavor. The next few days passed with failed attempts and clockwise stirring, the tears remained unchanged and were dwindling away. Ron decided to bet the last few drops on one final grasp at Severus's consciousness.

He picked up a bezoar. Staring at the item that had once saved his life, he simply injected the bezoar with the final few tears. His hope was that the powers of the bezoar would allow the healing properties to work while also nullifying the poisonous effects. Praying, Ron performed a spell to determine the effects of the tear-infused bezoar. Satisfied with the results the spell had shown, Ron packed up his cure, grabbed his coat, and apparated to St. Mungo's.

In Severus' Room

Kneeling next to the bed Ron held Severus' hand while he waited for the present healer to leave the room and tried to act as normal as he could. The moment the healer left, Ron whipped out his coat from beneath the bed and removed the bezoar. He gingerly opened Severus' mouth and placed the bezoar inside. Ron closed Severus' mouth and watched as Severus swallowed.


	2. Talking Through Tears

Chapter 2

**A/N: Ok so I had a fail of epic proportions and didn't say that I had two lovely ladies help edit last time. THANK YOU to RearviewxMirrors and my friend Etta. So I was giving myself a challenge with this pairing. Severon is my absolute FAVORITE Harry Potter pairing. (I know I'm weird but you're reading this so you must be too.) So my challenge was that I would have no dialogue until the first time Severus and Ron talk to each other. It was a bit difficult and since this is my first real story on its interesting. Also the updates might be a bit scattered because I write as I get inspired. Unreliable, I know. But it makes the story better. I think. HINT: Reviews=inspiration. The more reviews I get the faster I write. **

**P.S. It might be a while before the next update as I'm going to be in England and without internet for awhile. :D**

Talking Through Tears

Ron waited several tense moments and nothing happened. Severus was as still and quiet as ever. Ron sighed and despair started welling through him. He suddenly felt too closed in. The walls in the room were sucking the air from his lungs and converging on him. Ron couldn't stay in the healers ward for any longer. Ron placed his lips on Severus's hand and then apparated out.

…

The Next Day

…

Ron lay in his bed in a flat on Diagon Alley. Listless and almost thoroughly heartbroken, he couldn't will himself to get up anymore. As he was drowning in self-pity and telling himself what a failure he was, an owl tapped the window. Opening the window he found a small note that looked as if it had been written in haste.

_Hurry to Severus Snape's room in St. Mungo's_

Staring at the note, Ron started hyperventilating. Had something gone wrong? Did the bezoar not cancel the poison? Had he killed Severus? Sucking in a huge breath, Ron calmed himself down, hastily threw on clothes and spun in place.

….

Ron ran as fast as he could towards Severus once he had apparated into the lobby. Throwing open the door to Severus' room he stopped and stared. Breathing heavily he strode over to the bed where Severus was now sitting up.

"You're finally awake." Ron choked out before sinking to his knees. He grasped Severus' hand and leaned his forehead against it.

"You're here," Severus said in a shocked voice.

"You idiot, where else would I be? I've been working on potions for months to make you wake up." Ron's eyes started welling up with tears but he held back as much as he could.

"I…You saw the memories in the vial?' Severus asked.

"Yes," A lone tear tracked down Ron's face, "I feel the same way, it took me awhile but these last few years I've been so mean to Harry and Hermione. It was mostly because I was having such a hard time with no one actually knowing me. And then you!" Ron completely broke down then. "Neither my family or my friends tried to look that hard at me and then I saw those memories of yours. You had figured me out. And I had been watching you for so long!" Ron tried to stifle his tears. Severus lifted Ron's face,

"You don't hate me? Despicable, cruel, _old_ Snape?"

"I couldn't hate you Sev. I figured you out too. You only act that grouchy because that's what everyone expects of you. I…I don't think you're old and I'm mature for my age."

Severus stared at Ron his eyes wide with hope, "Say that again. My name."

"S-Sev? I'm sorry But I though since Severus is a mouthful… " Ron trailed off as Severus bent down to kiss him.

….

R AND R!


	3. Silence of Tears

Hey guys, so this update is later than I expected it to be. (Don't hate me!) This summer has been a whirlwind experience. I went to England and Scotland to sing for about two weeks. When I got back home I had a few days before I left to live with my Grandma. She has limited internet access and I was working 9-16 hours a day bussing tables. After that I was in Maine for a week, again limited internet, and then when I got home we had a power outage. Haha it's kinda funny if you think about it I was cut off from the world! The only un-funny thing is my lack of internet and my inability to post this. XP Also I'm now in college so I don't know how much I will post or how frequent my posts will be so…yeah. A Big SHOUTOUT to the people who favorited and/or added me to their alerts! Reviewers are also amazing! **Please review, I can see you, you know**. I know you're reading this. Even if you wanna tell me I suck or that you clicked this by accident I'd appreciate the feedback. :D Thank you again to RearviewxMirrors.

P.S. I'm sorry it's so short. I just wanted to put this up for you.

Now on to the story.

It was a week later when St. Mungo's decided to release Severus. The week had dragged on with conferences with this healer and that. People came to commend Ron for his innovative way of healing Severus. Sev had been awarded an Order of Merlin First Class for his services in the war. Basically, when all was said and done, they were tired by the end of it all and hadn't gotten that much time alone to speak of their tentative relationship. Because the two men hadn't spoken to the other since that night in the healer's ward, fears and doubts began settling in. All of those reasons for them not to be together had seemed petty at first but as time drew on they became more real, and more frightening. These doubts raced through their minds as they held awkward conversations.

"So Sev, after St. Mungo's releases you where are you living?" asked Ron

"I've been trying to determine that actually." Sev responded, settling into his usual polite avoid-the-subject voice.

"You know—" Ron began but Severus cut him off.

"I am thinking of seeing what condition my house on Spinner's end is in. I don't want or need to go back to teaching now that the war is over."

"Oh," said Ron softly. "How about I help you move in?"

"I don—" Ron shot him a pleading look. "Ok." Sev replied.

A heavy silence fell between the two. In the background they could hear the everyday sounds of St. Mungo's Hospital for Magical Maladies and Injuries. The pattering of feet thundered in Severus' ears and the murmuring of the Healers seemed to flood Ron's mind. A few tense moments passed and then Severus got up and started moving about his small room. As Sev was crossing the room Ron stood up.

"D'you want me to help you? I can pack with you." Severus waited a few moments before asking something that had been on his mind since he woke up.

"Are you sure?" The question seemed to ring through the silence in the small room. Ron looked up and took a deep breath. He started to walk towards the older man as he closed the distance between them Sev took a step backwards. Ron continued walking forward and Severus kept backing up until he had backed into the wall.

"Am I sure?" Ron's voice shook with anger and pain. "Do you know how many months of sleepless nights I have had trying to wake you up? How every time I hit a dead end I would want to stop and just give up? But whenever I would see you there helpless in bed I just couldn't. Where did the snide and cruel and passionate about potions man I knew go? You really would think I wasn't sure? I can't believe…You're a bloody wanker." Ron's voice trembled with tears on the precipice of flowing. "How cou—"

"You talk too much." Sev interrupted. Severus moved in closing the gap between them and connected their mouths. Sev's arms wrapped around Ron as Ron moved his hands to clutch Sev's face and dark flowing hair. As their mouths moved against each others Ron had the fleeting thought that Sev's lips were surprisingly soft for the amount of scowling he did. As soon as he thought it the older man surged into him. There was no gap between the men and the moment was an intense frenzied outpouring of inner feelings and lust for the other. Ron began shiver and Severus pulled away with reluctance, as if he were being denied the rarest of potion ingredients.

"I think I need to sit down," panted the younger, as he clutched onto the elder for balance and stability. Severus drew in a breath and chuckled.

"I was thinking that I'd be bad at that since it's been so long, but I guess I'm naturally talented in more than just potions." He gave another smaller chuckle.

"Since it's been so long?" Ron asked.

"Well we all have our youthful liaisons don't we? However, because the Dark Lord came to power I had no time or use for any such things. If I could not trust who I was involved with, why would I get involved?"

Ron sat down on the cot in the room and pulled Severus down next to him.

"Seems sensible," he said, pulling Sev into another kiss, "but I'm glad that's not the situation anymore."


End file.
